Mission 2

DHS 54/100
(Not a good day for the brush. Distracted beyond belief and unable to concentrate so several mistakes. But, it is what it is.)


I reread yesterday's post, and realize that it doesn't paint an accurate picture. Not at all. It comes across as if the two predominate aspects of who i am are 'career' and 'spirituality.' While that's mostly true, there is a hole in that assertion big enough to drive a truck through. There is most definitely a third aspect of who i am, maybe a fourth.

As much as i value anything else, i value my health. In fact, if someone were to offer me an all expenses paid one-year retreat in a mountain monastery somewhere, but i knew that my health might suffer because of the living conditions, i would decline the offer. On the other hand, if someone offered to support me for one entire year, 100% of my expenses, on the condition that i trained hard, ran two marathons, rode by bike across the country, and went on an expedition to the HImilayas, with the condition that i could not spend any time during that year meditating or focusing on my spiritual life, i'd jump on the offer in a second. Or less.

Obviously i value my health. But it's more than just health, it's pushing myself physically to see how much i can do. You can be a reasonably healthy couch potato, but that's not the level i'm talking about. I value my health solely because of what it allows me to do with my physical body.

Another way to look at this is, on days when i'm down, not feeling all that content with life, do i head for my zafu? No. I head for my running shoes or my bicycle. And if i need more than just a few hours or a day, i head for my hiking boots and backpack and head for the trails; in the mountains if possible.

So, in addition to career and spirituality, i need to add health and the outdoors to my list of guiding principles. That leads me to list these as v1 of the fundamental principles that drive me:

Honesty

Very little matters to me more than honesty. If i meet someone who isn't being honest i lose respect immediately. I have little use for people who don't hold themselves to honesty in their interactions with others. If i don't think you are honest, i don't want to associate with you.

Challenge/Living up to my potential

I really do feel on some days that i'm cheating not just myself, but the whole world, if i don't go out and be all that i am capable of being. Lately i've realized that i'm now stuck with the thought: Professionally, either i'm not as good as i thought i was, or i haven't had the chance to show that i'm as good as i think i am. Which is it? Physically, i'm content with where i am in this area.

Growth

I can't even imagine a life where i am not always trying to learn and grow in some area, whether that is a language, spiritually, a new hobby, running faster, riding further, a new subject, reviewing an old subject, etc. I don't always have to live at the edge of the envelope, continually pushing its walls outward, expanding, but i have to know that i am growing, expanding who i am, what i am, what i know, what i can do. I have to know that i am exploring, not just sitting around base camp watching DVDs and reading.

"Truth"/Wisdom

I.E., who am i, who are we, what are we, what does it mean to be alive, and how do i apply this to the way i live my egoic life,

Love

I try to care for everyone, hope for the best for them, hope for their success, to enjoy them for who they are, with none of my expectations. With a few very rare exceptions, i'm reasonably successful. Where i'm not, it hurts. Am i good at showing that i value this? No. I'm a miserable failure in some respects because i've pulled into a shell over the past years; like living in a cave with a big sign on the front door that says "Love Ya!," even though i refuse to open the door and let people in.

Compassion

Everyone in the world, no matter their choice of politics, religion, ideology, and all those other dividing beliefs, know without doubt that a more compassionate world would be a better world. Yet, egoic beliefs are held in higher esteem. The vast majority of people are two-faced liars in this area. "I'm all for compassion," they swear, "as long as you accept my beliefs first." "You convert to my way and then i'll give you compassion." Sorry, but that's not how it works.

Well, that's what i come up with as the minimum list of fundamental principles that i can't imagine not having in my life. These are the standards that i live my life to. I'll reread it again later tonight, and then again tomorrow to see how it feels, and see if i still agree then.



The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.

Charles Du Bois