Conversation Two

What is important is not the destination, but the act of getting there. The Path itself is the goal.
The journey of one thousand miles begins with one step.

The first quote comes from the book Japanese Pilgrimage and this was my first introduction to the henro trail on Shikoku. I can still remember walking around a bookstore in Tōkyō one Saturday morning back in the '80s looking for something in English to read when i stumbled across this book. I have probably read it a dozen times since then.

Whether we're talking about the henro trail, a career, training for a marathon, or life in general, it is not the destination that is important, but the path you travel as you move in the direction of that destination. Yes, in most cases in life we have goals that we aspire to. We are trained from birth to set goals and to constantly evaluate our progress as we move towards them. Goals can be good things.

But, if you fixate on the goal and your eventual arrival at it, at the expense of the path you traverse to get there, you are missing most of your life. What's that quote? Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans?

To me, this is just so obvious that it affects every aspect of my life and who i am. I train for a marathon all summer, but i really don't care what time i get at the race. The last two years, i didn't even run the race. Yes, i set time goals, but if i come in slower, i don't care. The training was what i valued because that is what gave me health, a wealth of beautiful mornings outdoors, and a great tan. :-)

I do meditate, but not because i have any illusions of enlightenment or amazing spiritual states. I do it because of the slow, steady progress i make in understanding how my mind works and because it allows me to see reality in a way that i couldn't before. Meditation is all about the slow, steady progress of letting go, over the course of a lifetime, not about getting somewhere and attaining anything.

And i look at a profession in the same way. I have to work to pay the bills. That means a third to a half of my days are taken up by my job (or, they were until i quit anyhow). A job, a profession, a career, is not about getting to a certain salary, a certain title, a certain position, and then knowing that you have finally arrived. I believe that most people who approach their careers with this attitude use other people to get there.

I work to make a living, i don't work for a living. That's two completely different concepts. And that could explain my professional problems. For me, working is a two-way street, a relationship of give and take. I do my best to improve the work i give you each day, and in return you do your best to improve the work you give me each day. It's the path that is important, not the job title i put on my door.

Life is a journey. You are born, and someday you will die. That much is certain. What makes it all worth it, what makes it interesting, what brings it all meaning, is what you do with each and every day that you live in between those two defining moments. If you just plod along on autopilot, getting up, going to work, going home, eating dinner, going to bed, ... and repeating that cycle every day, week after week, year after year, decade after decade, (life after life), what's the point?

I have said this a thousand times in my Shikoku journal, there is a world of difference between existing and living. You exist when you live solely for a goal and its accomplishment; when everything but the goal's accomplishment is inconsequential. You live when you set a goal, but derive your life's meaning from the work you do each and every day on the trail towards that goal. When you derive meaning and satisfaction from the small daily victories. When you go to bed each night knowing that what you did today, you did just a little better than you did yesterday. Or, when you didn't do as well, at least you were able to learn something of value from the experience.

You live when you appreciate each and every day for what it was — another chance to live; another chance to breath; another chance to love. How you live is what defines your life, not whether you accomplished one or another goal on any given day.

The path is the goal.

A while ago i gave a quote from the book The Warlord, and in it they talk about life, not as the process of getting somewhere, but as the continuous process of watching your essence unfold. You don't know what that essence is, you don't know where it came from, and you can't say with any certainty how it will unfold over the course of your 80-some years of life. But life is how you approach that unfolding and how you you relate your unfolding to that of everyone else.

In the bible, there is a nice verse that points to the same thing. "The wind blows wherever it will, and you hear the sound it makes, but do not know where it comes from and where it is going. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit." You know the wind is there, it is obvious, and you know it came from somewhere 'over there' and is going in 'that direction.' But, you don't really know any more. You don't know where it came from or where it is going, only that it is here.

Life too, is exactly like this. You know you were born, back then. You know you're getting older, and are vaguely certain you can give some outlines of what direction you are headed in life; physically, intellectually, and spiritually. But you certainly don't know where you came from or where you are eventually going, even though you may have great stories and firm beliefs.

The only thing we have for certain is the path we walk from the day of our birth to our very last breath. The goal of our life is to walk our paths with intelligence, dignity, and humility. The goal of our life is to appreciate every day on the path, to work to improve ourself with each step, and to ensure that our path doesn't harm others.

Choose a direction, set a goal, look for mile posts along the way, but don't lose sight of the path. Don't let the flow of time overshadow the moments of your life. Don't lose sight of the individual paint strokes in your daily life in your eagerness to see the entire picture.

The path is the goal.